Szeder XMAS 2016

 

It’s time for John Szeder‘s year-in-review Christmas poem!

 

‘Twas the night before christmas, and before it all ended,
Half of the internet found itself unfriended.

We are still waiting for the year of VR.
It’s stuck in traffic, in a self-driving car.

Blogging is out–all that writing is tedium,
Unless, of course, it was posted on medium.

Or else it was twittered, or if you like, tweeted:
140 characters, invariably deleted.

The buyers keep buying; the sellers keep selling.
Amazon has less of us leaving our dwelling.

People are talking about new services and toys.
The signal is indistinguishable from all of the noise.

So what could all of this possibly mean?
What is the statement for 2016?

What is this “The Year Of”, What is new? What is trending?
What thing do we humblebrag in tones condescending?

Is IoT enabling your elf on the shelf?
Did you run all the numbers on your quantifiable self?

Can you control your video games with a gesture or thought?
Are your interactions meaningful with your conversational bot?

I watch it all crawling forward, I sigh and I shrug.
2016 is The Year Of We All Need A Hug.

So go wrap some arms around whoever is near,
And have a merry Christmas and happy New Year!

— John Szeder 2016

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